Greetings, Chronivac subscribers! We here at Chronivac are always working to bring you, our beloved customer base, only the very best in reality manipulation devices. That is why we are SO PROUD of Chronivac 5.0. But hey, don't take just our word on it. Take a look at some of the feedback we've been getting testing it out on random test subjects in the universe for Earth 245. Some of you have asked why we use it so much. It's a universe that has not reached other planets for colonization and nanotech is just beginning there. But the inhabitants are familiar enough with the concepts we embody to make it ideal for testing without fear of our purposes being misunderstood.
So, enjoy the stories as they arrive in your mailboxes. We do not write these ourselves, merely ask satisfied users to describe for us some of their joys and triumphs. We hope you are inspired by them. We know we are.
At the grand old age of 90, I found myself in an elderly home. My two sons were dead. My grandkids stuck me in here so they could steal my house. I could barely move. That's when the nurse from Chronivac visited. She said I needed to sign a form so she could help me get this package. I wondered who could have sent me a gift. Most of my friends were dead. The nurse was this smoking hot little number of a redhead. God, what a figure! But I'm not like some of these old guys, I would never tell her that. I didn't want to bother her or anyone else. Just to stop being so alone.
I served my country back in WWII. Most of you young folk can't know what it was like but I've spent a lifetime getting over it. I am proud of what we did as a nation to pull together and this new generation makes me nearly weep with the trashed economy they've inherited. So many kids are just out of luck. Back when I was young you could buy a house if you worked hard. Now these days? Bah. Don't even get this old man started.
Anyway the nurse, her name was Alice, she asked me if I could be any age, what would it be. She has this contraption. It's a real spiffy looking computer thing. Real high tech lookin' but then this old man still thinks electric typewriters are high tech. I'm an old fart. Deal with it. So I say, that would probably be before I went off to war, I was 17 and having the time of my life one minute, then I'm shooting to save my life the next. She makes some funny lights go off. It's like I was surrounded in some kind of field of light and then I blink and get up and she says, go look in the mirror, Mr. Waters.
I do and the next thing you know I look like this. I nearly cried. She gave me some new clothes and I put them on. She took me outside and said it was time to go. I had a million questions. Who was she? An angel? She laughed and said no. "I'm just doing the job I love to do." She brought me out to her car and told me to get in. We drove into town. I had marveled at all the old people in the home that didn't recognize me and as I walked down the street I thought I must have died and gone to heaven, but then I saw some goddamned obese woman walking around in a bikini and disgustedly realized I wasn't in heaven. Just plain old Earth.
She took me to a restaurant. I haven't been able to have a lot of food like I used to really enjoy for a long time. I ordered a burger and fries and gulped them down. God, I forgot what it was like to be this hungry! I talked and ate, then had an ice cream.
"Okay, tiger. So here's the deal. I can give you a new reality. I can give you a new family. Or I can just make you rich, on your own."
"I've already had my family, sweetheart. No offense, but I'll take the money. Only, what will I tell people? I mean I'm 90 and I look like I could be my great grandson for Chrissakes."
"Oh, that's nothing a little creativity can't solve. I'll give you a new identity but you'll keep your memories. I'll make it so it's all kosher. You won't have to worry about anyone being suspicious. And as for your old family, they'll remember you passing quite some time ago."
She drove me home to my new house. It was a beautiful one. There was a shiny red sports car in the driveway.
"Is that puppy mine?"
"Yes, sir, it is."
"Alice! How can I ever thank you, baby?"
"It's more how we can thank you for doing a service to your country, soldier." She saluted me. I nearly cried again. I had a second chance at life. Alice gave me the rundown. My new name was Kevin Rivers, (I guess it sounded more modern than my old name, never mind what it was, I don't even tell people what it was). My parents were dead a few years and my uncle (a man who was the grandson of an old war buddy, by coincidence) helped to emancipate me so I could live on my own. My family was rich. And I had a substantial inheritance. Alice took care of things so that the subject of the parents I never knew would just never come up. Smart gal.
Well, nothing more to say, really. Except my days are spent mainly in showing off my new bod to all the sweet young honeys and boy I gotta say even though these hormones make me stupid the younger kids love themselves some book learnin'. One thing I didn't know anything about was computers so I asked Alice to help me with that (I had a special Chronivac package that allowed me to contact her anytime) and she sent me a program that allowed me to download computer classes right into my noggin. Do you know what it's like? I know how to CODE now. I know all about the Internet and viruses and all that jazz. I fit right into modern society.
Well, sort of. I'm a bit old fashioned. I tend to attract the classier girls in high school that would love to hang out with college guys. I tend to be very protective and almost fatherly to friends of mine and it's made me the go to advice guy on campus. Ha! My teachers love me for my maturity. I got voted class president. I'm on my way to Yale.
What can I say? I owe it all to Chronivac. Now I ain't from your dimension doohicky whatever, but they are nice people workin' over at that place. You take it from me. I can't ever repay them for what they did. And as for the interface, it's very user friendly. I should know, now if you excuse me I got a date with a young honey and she loves nothin' more than to talk about history with me. She says I'm different from other boys. I know things. Honey, you have no idea. If I can know the joy of even makin' out again I think I'm gonna fly to the moon! Hey I wonder if Chronivac can...you know what? I don't want to be greedy. My review: Five stars, baby! FIVE STAR REVIEW
Okay, so my review won't be that long but I just wanted to say how much I love my Chronivac. I haven't used it on myself but rather my boyfriend. You can see what he looked like before and after. Now, my boyfriend used to hate smoking. He would always complain when we were around it and my secret passion was for pipes and cigars. I finally confessed this to him, and told him it was my biggest turn on.
He pretty much turned me down flat and even threatened to break up with me if I ever smoked around him. Then next thing you know I get chosen for the Chronivac sweepstakes or whatever you call them.
I programmed him to be hairy, bearded and I also changed a few other things. I had him go from a tech expert to a machinist. I generally made him more masculine. Now he liked football instead of ballet. He preferred beer to wine and always, always welcomed the chance to smoke a pipe with another guy. I don't mind saying I also made him a little bigger down there. And he knows how to use it. God damn, when he fucks me know it's like a fucking jackhammer! And he wants me to call him Daddy. It's almost too good! I love it so much!
The pipe sex, though, is amazing. I never thought I'd get the chance to have sex with a guy while smoking but when we swap smoke it's one of the sexiest things on the planet. Or he'll smoke in the living room while I sit in his lap. Thank you so much, Chronivac!!! FIVE STAR REVIEW
So, this is not me. This is my older jock roommate Freddy. Freddy and me don't get along. I'm a nerd and like a foot shorter than him and even though I'm in college I look like I'm fucking twelve. No lie.
He was, in a nutshell, a nightmare. He would come in all hours. He would kick me out of OUR room so HE could fuck chicks practically all the time. I was getting so fucking man. I wanted to kick his ass so bad I DREAMED of it. He humiliated me by constantly mocking me for my size. EVERY FUCKING DAY it was something. In front of other people that said nothing as he would think he was so hilarious! He swaggered around like he owned the entire world. He had so much confidence it was SICKENING!
"What's up, little man? I'm gonna go fuck Christine over in Alpha House. Too bad you can't go but we have a midget shortage and we need to conserve. HA!"
"Hey what's up, little man? Hey I wanted to give you something. This is a condom. Now I know you don't know how to use one but one day when you're a big boy you will. You just put it over your...you know what, maybe I'm talking to the wrong person. HA! Just kidding, little dude. Hey did you do my laundry like I asked you to?"
I had started doing his laundry just so he wouldn't humiliate me in front of all his jock buddies when they came over.
"Hey little buddy. Hey, do you wanna come with us to Six Flags? Oh wait, you can't go on any of the rides. Forgot. HA! Just kidding man. But I uh, have to kick you out, shithead. Jenny is coming over and we're gonna fuck like animals. Probably on your bed. Don't wanna get mine dirty. Just stay in the library tonight."
Then I got my Chronivac and when I realized what it could do, I knew exactly what I wanted.
I would make him suffer as he never had before. I programmed all of the new stats and changed reality so only he and I would remember the stud god he was BEFORE my changes.
I heard the scream when he got up. I followed him into the living room and said
"Well well well. Look how the mighty have FALLEN!"
"How did this happen? How did you do this? Am..am I on drugs?"
"You fucking wish!" I knocked him down and put my full weight on top of him.
"Get this through your brain, SHITHEAD. I changed your life and now no one remembers BIG Bob. You are a SHRIMP now. Your name is Bobbie, with an "i" like a girl. Now go do my fucking laundry or I'll fucking flush your face in the toilet, you dumb fuck." I slapped him a little bit. I came by later that day and he was miserable. He'd found out his world was gone. All his jock buddies had no idea who he was except for being "that midget dude".
I said I didn't give a shit. He said to get ready for a world of pain.
I laughed in his pathetic face.
"What exactly do you think is gonna happen here, LITTLE MAN? Get the fuck out of here before I make you REALLY pay. Maybe I'll make you a little GIRL midget. How would you like that?"
"No! You wouldn't!"
"Fucking try me, SHITHEAD. Now did you do my laundry yet? No? Well then get fucking busy. NOW. I own your tiny ass in case you haven't figured it out by now."
Little Bobbie got more and more used to his life as a dwarf. He even made friends with some of the other dwarves in the city. He met them through the Internet.
He started working out even though, realistically, who wanted to date someone the size of a child?
Well, me for one. I was gay and basically just beginning to test out the Chronivac. I changed things up a bit. I made Bobbie more and more subservient. Then I upped my own masculinity. When I came out of my bedroom the next day, I looked like this:
"What's up, Little Man?" I asked. He looked way, way up.
"No way." he whispered.
"Yeah, not bad, huh? Made a few improvements on myself." Not to mention you, I thought. I had ramped up his libido to extra horny and willingness to please alpha males, not to mention the fact I had made him 100% gay.
"Oh wow, you look great!"
"Yeah I do, don't I? Thanks, little man. I like it when you compliment me. You should do that more."
"Okay! Do you want me to make you some breakfast. Wow, look at your muscles! They're huge!"
"Yeah, you like that?" I held his shoulder gently and gave it a slight tug. I could tell his micropenis was going to go crazy like any minute now.
"Holy cow. You're the strongest, best looking guy on the planet!"
"What are you, some kind of faggot? Clean up my fucking room!" I stormed out of there. Thus was the beginning of a beautiful friendship in which Bobby the Jock turned into Bobbie the Midget Cumdump for me. I'd come home and make him suck me off whenever I felt like it or just bring guys over so he could listen to me fuck them. If I was generous he was allowed to jerk off in the corner and watch. No one ever wanted to fool around with him in terms of affection but a few guys were willing to jerk off on him or make him suck their cocks. Bobbie is more like my loving servant than lover. I think I'll keep him that way for life.
And he was very supportive in my new football and basketball careers which were once his. He no longer had a monopoly on sports in the dorm. No, I was now the dominant jock and he was always showing up to events to watch.
So, thanks to Chronivac. I have never been happier and I feel like justice in the universe has been served. I love you, Chronivac Industries! You guys absolutely rule! FIVE STAR REVIEW