Caption: A financially sound plan

Caption: 15 Years is a Lot of Time

Caption: Lessons Take Time

Caption: Taking Dad's Girlfriend

Proving a Point Part 1

"Austin, I do not believe you! This is so irresponsible!"

"Dad, come on..."

"No, Austin. You need to admit what a big deal this is. You need to get how you know nothing about responsibility. Part of growing up means you have to deal with adult problems, and this is about as immature as it gets. So explain to me, from the beginning, what exactly happened?"

 "Nothing!"

"NOTHING? Care to try again?"

"Well it wasn't my fault because Casey and Eric were skateboarding with me and Casey swerved in front of me and it was a complete accident!"

"Where were you skateboarding?"

"I don't know," Austin said meekly.

"I don't know? You don't know? Are you sure?"

"Okay! I was on the hill."

"You were on the hill I've told you not to skateboard on. But you wanted to because you wanted to look cool in front of your friends!"

"Dad, please!"

"No, you are grounded for the next two months. You almost got killed. A car could have hit you, and you wound up breaking someone's radio antennae. And the car that swerved...you're so lucky they aren't pressing charges or suing me!"

"Their car was fine though," Austin said quietly.

"Yeah, and they had some old woman inside and they had to stop real hard. You don't think about how hard it is being a single father. You have no idea how hard it is for me to have to deal with this shit."

"This is so unfair," Austin pouted, his voice cracking.

"What? What was that? No, I'm sorry, what was that?"

"Nothing."

"No, tell me how good I have it."

"You have it so good! You don't have any problems like I have!"

"HA! Are you kidding me? You are so grounded. Grounded. that means no TV. No video games. Nothing but books and studying. No loser friends, either. You want to look cool in front of them, just wait until they see you with no skateboard. Which I'm taking, by the way."

"You never want to hear my side of anything!"

"And you never learn anything!"

"If I was in charge it would be different. I wouldn't treat YOU this way!"

"Like a maturing adult? I don't know why I do. I treat you the way my father treated me. You're in a child's body but one day you'll be a man and then you'll be glad I taught you everything I did, especially about respect, of which you have very little. Now, I have a business dinner to attend. If you leave this house, I'll know and find out about it. Believe me. Go to your room and think about what you've done."

Austin went upstairs. Life was so unfair. He hadn't meant to do anything. He couldn't just tell his friends he wasn't going to skateboard with them. He had to act cool or he wouldn't have any friends and then he'd wind up getting bullied like some of the kids he'd seen at school. Things went on all the time when adults weren't looking. Dad just didn't want to care about how hard it was being a kid. All he cared about was himself. He walked to his room and miserably laid down on his bed, and buried his head in his pillow. 

I wish I could be in charge and not him, he thought. He drifted off...

Downstairs, Larry (Austin's father) dozed on the couch. He was exhausted. It wasn't enough he was working his ass off to pay all the bills and give Austin the chance at a life he never had, but now his kid was just not listening to him. He just wanted Austin to listen and do the bare minimum. He had to do SO much more when he was a kid. Too bad they didn't live in a house with a big yard, with wood to chop. Austin could learn a thing or two from doing that.

He drifted off, unable to fight off the fatigue...

Austin woke up on the couch where his father had been dozing. Rubbing his eyes, he got up. Did Dad bring him down here? He was so tired. He walked around the coffee table thinking something was off. He felt dizzy or something...everything seemed contorted. Was he dreaming? He must be dreaming, since everything was at a different angle...it was like he was way taller. He must be dreaming or sick or...

He walked into the bathroom and saw his dad.

"Dad! Sorry! Where did you come from!?" He blinked, terrified for a moment, in a way he couldn't describe. "Why are you saying what I'm saying AHHHHHHHHHHH!" His eyes went wide. His father's eyes went wide. He waved. His father waved.

No it can't be. It can't be it can't be it can't be! NO FUCKING WAY, he thought.

The man in the bathroom looked at his reflection in disbelief. He scoffed several times, and looked at himself like he couldn't possibly believe what he was seeing. He tentatively reached a hand up to touch his rough sandpaper stubble, and ran a hand over his chest, covered in fine black hair.

He looked around, looking for someone who was in on the joke, smiling enthusiastically. 

"Testing, testing. I have my dad's voice. I look like my dad. OH MY GOD!"

This is real. I have my dad's voice. I have my dad's chest hair. I have my dad's...  

He immediately dropped his boxer shorts (boxer shorts!) and realized how much had changed. He delicately took his now absolutely huge dick and smiled and just held it in amazement. His balls were also huge, two big eggs on either side. 

"This is crazy. This...how did this happen?" He looked at himself in the mirror. "And who the hell cares? I got my wish. Oh wow. Wow wow wow!" He did a little happy dance in the mirror. 

Dad must be...me. I guess. I hope he's me. If he isn't me, someone else is. What if a bunch of people switched with each other and someone else is in my body? I better check. Just to make sure.

He walked upstairs, smiling at his newfound weight as the stairs creaked when before they didn't. He added a little momentum as he ran to his room. He prepared himself. Smiled. Took a deep breath. Knocked on the door. He heard his body groan. He opened the door. His body looked at him sleepily, got up, looked confused, looked back at Austin, who was now the dad in the room, the adult smiling down at his son.

"Hi, Daddy."

Larry screamed and found himself trying to run but Austin was too big and stopped him easily. The two danced with each other, Larry struggling in a moment of complete panic and confusion. Austin covered his mouth so he couldn't scream and held him down on the ground after they wrestled for a while. 

"It's okay. It's okay, dad. I had the same reaction. Well, you know. I mean, it's real and all and you're in my body now. So I'm going to take my hand off your mouth in just a sec and I want you to be calm, okay? Don't freak out. One. Two. Three." Austin stood up and looked uncomfortable as his "son" got up and was still breathing shallowly. 

"How the fuck did this happen? I must be going crazy. I'm having some kind of psychotic breakdown. This isn't real. I must be crazy."

"Nope, we just switched bodies. It's so cool! I have armpit hair! Look!" He twisted the armpit hair and then looked back at his dad mischievously. And grinned. He was carrying himself the way he did as a child, with his arms twisting in embarrassment and glee. 

"How could this happen? I was on the couch. I dozed off. And now I'm a..." Larry ran to the upstairs bathroom down the hall. He flipped on the switch. Everything towered above him. Suddenly the ceiling was WAY further up than it had been before. "This is impossible. Why am I in your body? Why?! Why did this happen?" He looked at his son suspiciously.

"I dunno!"

"How did you do this?"

"I didn't do this. I have no idea how we traded but I'm glad we did! I'm in charge now!" His face made an "O" as it dawned on him. "I was wishing I could be in charge. Someone listened cuz now we have! This is amazing."

"Well I need you go give me my body back! I need to go to a work dinner tonight! It's important."

"No. You're not goin' anywhere. CUZ YOU'RE GROUNDED OHHHHHHHH!" Austin did a ridiculous victory dance in front of his father, and moved his now giant arms and legs in "yes" gestures, shaking his fists in victory and smug self congratulation. "I'M AN A-DULT. YOU ARE A KID. I'M AN A-DULT. YOU ARE A KID!" he sang-song.

Larry stared up in complete disbelief and horror. "No. No, I'm not a kid! I'm in a nightmare. I need to wake up!" 

Austin stopped to look down at his dad and scoffed as if he couldn't believe Dad wasn't accepting reality. He'd accepted it pretty quickly! He picked up his father and held him in mid air, and then carried him in his arms. 

"Wow, this is awesome! I'm totally big and an adult and you're all little!"

"Put. Me. Down, Austin. NOW."

"Okay!" Austin began to fling his father on the ground and then swung him last minute until he was on the floor, unhurt.

"Ahhhhhhhhhh I'm bigger than you, dad! And you have to do what I say, cause I'm your dad now and you are my son!"

"We have to SWITCH BACK! THIS DOESN'T HAPPEN!!!"

"Well young man, I think we need to talk about how you need to respect me more," Austin said, crossing his arms. The phone rang. Austin went to his dad's room to answer it. 

"Do not answer that!"

"Why not? It's MY phone!" Austin was really enjoying every minute of this. "Hello? Yes, this is Larry. Why? Uh...I just took a nap. I will. Yeah. Sure. Okay. See you soon!"

"Who was that? Was that who I think it was?"

"Yep that was that fat dude you work with. I'm gonna go to a party!"

"You can't and you won't!"

"Uh huh!"

"You can't drive! You're a little boy! You don't know the first thing about operating a vehicle!"

Austin's eyes went wide. "I can drive now! I didn't even THINK of that!"

"Oh god..."

Austin ran downstairs and Larry followed.

"Son, you can't go to that party. It's at a restaurant and it's a fancy business dinner. I forbid you from going."

Austin swung around, putting on his dad's pants now. "Wow your pants fit me! This is SO AWESOME!"

"You can't do this. You'll get killed if you drive."

"So I'll take a cab. I got plenty of cash."

"No. No it is too expensive. You will to take a cab." Austin dialed and asked for a cab and Larry was helpless to do anything.

"Hey, what restaurant is it at? I need to know that."

"Well I'm not telling you!" 

"Just kidding, the fat guy told me where they were. They're gonna go to a bar first and get some drinks and I'll meet them up there. Hey. I can drink beer now! Wow!" Austin looked very comical to anyone that might have walked in at this point, a grown man excited by such things would be very out of place indeed.

"Austin, you can't just leave. We need to figure this thing out."

"You figure it out," Austin said, putting on his dad's shirt and sportscoat. "Hey I look pretty good. You know, for an old dude."

"Have you thought about how the hell we're gonna get back?"

"No, why?"

"Because we need to a) figure out what happened and b) figure out how to get back to normal. Can you think of anything that might have caused this."

"No dad, I told you." Austin rolled his eyes. "I dunno. But I'm gonna go to your fancy shmancy dinner so suck it.  Ha ha!" 

Austin went outside to wait for his cab. He went through his dad's wallet, checking out his credit cards, and new ID. "When I get back you'll have to tell me all the numbers I need for these. And how much money I have now."

"Can I tell you how to do my job as well?"

"Nah, I'll figure it out. Can't be that hard. Can't be as hard as being a kid."

"Jesus, I can't believe this. Austin, please, do not drink tonight. I...have work tomorrow. Oh God. Just claim to be sick. Stall for time, that's what we need to do."

"Nope, I'm gonna go to work tomorrow and you can go to school and I'm gonna have tons of fun because your life is WAY easier than mine."

"Ya wanna bet?"

"Yeah! If I'm wrong...I get to keep your body!" Austin laughed at his own joke and bent over and was generally acting like a little kid acts, being very physical and moving all over the place with hyperactive happiness. He swung around the porch column in circles while his dad tried to talk to him. 

"Son..."

"Hey my cab is here. Cool. Well son, have a good night. Don't stay up late for me. I have work tomorrow. Because I'm a cool grown up and stuff."

"This is not happening. And I will wait up. You come the hell back as soon as dinner is over, do you understand me?" Larry pointed a tiny finger menacingly at his son. Austin responded by not being the slightest bit concerned and he waved goodbye as he got in the cab, bouncing on the seat a few time and smiling like he'd just won the lottery.

Larry went back inside and watched TV waiting for his "dad" to come back. What could possibly happen if Austin went to work for him??

TO BE CONTINUED

Not Your Usual Field Trip

"You two are gonna have fun today, you'll see."
"Have fun? Our sons are at home in our bodies and you think we'll have fun at the museum??"
"Well you had fun the first time you were there on the field trip! It's been two whole days! You can't miss school for too much longer, people will start calling. We need to find this guy. And besides, your Aunt Vivian is here to make sure nothin' happens to you."
"Something already did happen to us! And very funny."
"Oh come on, you two are so cute! How can I resist. Look at you, with your bubbles!"
"Seriously, John, that is completely embarrassing." Kevin looked at his new "brother".
"Whatever. I'm in the body of my six year old son. I might as well enjoy it."
"God you even sound like a little kid."
"So do you! So do you!"
"Don't fight you two, or no ice cream later."
"This is a nightmare," said Kevin. "The boys said that the security guard was named Max but no one named Max works there, we checked."
"So it's some random magical security guard? Great, this is like something from a movie." John blew his bubbles.
John was secretly starting to worry. He felt like a kid again. He felt like playing with toys constantly, and every man on earth now towered over him as a giant, including his little boy! How could someone do this, even if they were able to? Didn't they know that a grown adult couldn't live like this? He blew bubbles more.
"Would you quit with the damn bubbles?!"
"I'm nervous and it makes me look the part, okay? Fine, here," John dumped the bubbles in a nearby garbage bin.
"What if we don't find him? What if we're stuck like this? God, my body is eight years old and my eight year old son is in mine. He doesn't know how to drive or go to work. What will we do? What can we do?"
"We'll get through it. We're family. That's what family does?"
"So how about we go see an R rated movie after the museum?" John asked.
"Do you have absolutely no priorities?" Kevin was amazed.
"Yeah and besides which, I can't bring a little kid to an R rated movie. What if one of my neighbors saw me? I would simply be mortified." Kevin rolled his eyes.
"I think I should probably tell you guys something," John began.
"Oh, I don't like the sound of that," Vivian said, in her constantly worried voice. His aunt in real life had now become his great aunt. John continued.
"When we were at the field trip I sort of met this guy."
"What? Why didn't you say something?"
"Because the boys finally came forward after two days and talked about how they made their wish but I sort of...look...he tricked me okay? How was I supposed to know he was for real?"
"What are you talking about? What did you do?"
"I thought he worked there. He talked about how much fun the kids were having. He asked me if I thought I wanted to feel that carefree again. And not have to deal with work. And then...I wished we could be kids again. Both of us."
"You what? How could you?" Kevin yelled.
"Oh like I knew this was going to happen," John replied.
"You two might have to get used to this," Vivian. "Oh think of those poor boys. What you've done to them! They will have to be the grown ups and...oh we better hope we fight that Max guy!"
"Time's a wasting! Come on!" Kevin said, as boldly as an 8 year old could. He would handle the boys if it came to it, but right now they had to at least track this guy down and unwish themselves back to normal, and fast!

Meanwhile, back home, the boys were anything but miserable...

"FUCK YOU, DAD!"
Jerry giggled to himself. Charles continued practicing,
"FUCK YOU, DAD! You don't tell adults what to do! We tell you what to do! NOW SHUT UP AND GO TO YOUR ROOM OR I'LL GIVE YOU A SPANKING!"
"You sound just like grown ups!"
"We are grown ups. Now and for good, stupid."
"I'm not stupid! Nuh uh! Am not! Am not!"
Charles, now in his father Kevin's body, ripped off the nametag his brother was playing with.
"You gotta start acting like an adult, man. MAN. Heh. You're a man now. This is awesome."
"I have hair on my face!"
"Dude, you haven't washed the spell off yet? You need to wipe that off before they get back. It's what makes this permanent. Wash it off and we get to stay in these bodies. If they see it they might suspect that the old man told us how to do it and how."
"I get to be a grown up and I don't have to go to school anymore! I get to watch TV whenever I want and stay up late!"
"And we get to punish our dads like they used to punish us all the time," said Charles darkly. "I can't wait til aunt Viv takes off. We'll convince her when the spell really starts to kick in. We're gonna get all their knowledge about how to do grown up stuff. Just wait. It'll be great. I can't wait to drive."
"What are you talking about, Charles. I know how to drive," said Jerry in a very mature manner. "Holy shit, I know how to drive! And I can say bad words! Shit! Fuck! I'm not even afraid daddy will hear me!"
"That's because you are daddy now, stupid."
"I'm not stupid. I'm a financial investor with an MA. Hey! I have all of dad's knowledge! Oh this is gonna be awesome! But..."
"But what?"
"But they're just gonna be like little kids. I didn't know how this would feel."
"I know how I feel. I feel like a fuckin' beer. And start calling me Kevin. And you're John. Our kids are Jerry and Charles now."
"This is gonna be so much to get used to. I'm tall and I have the knowledge of an adult now. Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" asked the new John.
"That we know what these bodies want? And it ain't lemonade."
"It's a good thing both our dads are single. And that they are both gay. And they aren't related by blood." The two moved closer and started rubbing against each other. "How about you grab me a beer, too?"
"How about we get Viv to babysit while we out and "try and find the security guard". We'll explain that we've become like our dads. That we have their memories. Which she should believe since..."
"They are probably acting just like little kids right now."
"Right. I am getting my dad's memories."
"Me too! About how we met, fell in love, both had sons and formed a family..."
"I think this is the beginning of a new family."
"Works for me...Dad."

The Ultimate Witness Protection

Authors Note: This story is a collaboration between Derek (muscledrain) and YoungTrevor.


“What the fuck? You said I would be safe!”

Will yelled at the phone. He couldn't believe what he just heard. It was Deputy U.S. Marshall Max Richardson. He said Will's son Tyler had accidentally revealed his real name and now it was necessary for them to be relocated to another state again.

Will's troubles had started years ago when he had witnessed, along with his son, the murder of a con man in charge of the company Will worked for. Although he had managed to convince everyone he didn't know about his boss's shadier deals, he was a marked man after that. The assassins had chased after him but he had gotten his son to safety, speeding through traffic and to a local police station. Ever since this had happened, they had been to a number of small towns where Will worked menial jobs. None of them were up to his ability. He had worked in a warehouse, a deli, a thrift shop. He took it out on Tyler as often as he could. Tyler just had no idea how hard he worked for so little. And how his life been absolutely ruined.  Tyler didn't care about anything but himself. He never stopped to think about Will's hard work. No, it was dad I need a skateboard. Dad, I need a laptop. Dad, you don't make enough money. 

He often yelled at the kid and grounded him. And raised absolute hell the last time this had happened. Tyler complained that he couldn't get close to anyone. So he talked. To girls, mainly, ones that he wanted to "get close" to. Will was infuriated by these "slip ups". The entire school Tyler went to went wild when one girl told everyone there. So they had to move. Again. Last time he'd taken a belt to the kid and he thought that was enough incentive but it looks like Tyler was being willful and defiant. There was no other explanation.

An hour later, Will was led to an interrogation room where Tyler was already waiting.

“Tyler, how many times did I tell you? You are grounded for life!”

“Dad, I'm so sorry...”

They were cut short by Richardson. “Will, you are in a bad situation. It seems Petrofsky already got some information about you. He got wind of it and sent some of his men to snoop around. Now, Will, you happen to know some very sensitive information about our government. Back when you worked for your boss, rest his soul, you read classified documents he had obtained about military secrets and contracts unknown to the public. You also aided us in capturing at least one of the men who killed him. And you handed all of the paperwork you had. This is why we've been so interested in helping you avoid such a possible calamity as getting caught. In spite of the fact that I have always suspected you knew more than you said you knew, I like you Will. You have a mind on you and now you're working shit jobs. Well, so are a lot of people. But my point is, you have potential. I think you know how to help your country. That helps us. We help you back. And we can help each other out yet again. So this time, we're going to do something a little different."

"What, ship us out to Alaska?" I said drily. 

"That would be so cool!"

"Tyler, shut up! You're grounded. Don't talk."

"We're not going to provide you a whole new identity. We're going to give you both a new body.”

“What? What are you talking about?”

“We're going to swap your bodies with someone else. It's a recently developed technology but we have a couple of successful cases.”

“I can't believe this.”

"We realized during certain cloning experiments that we could take tissue from a sample donor and grow a body for it, but there's nothing upstairs. It's just empty brain matter, waiting to be filled. We'll record your entire mind and download it into those bodies."

"You're telling me that you actually have the technology to do this? Like Avatar?"

"Actually...we've had this technology since the 1960s. But you didn't hear it from me," Richardson smiled a dark smile. "And you young man. What are we going to do with your big goddamn mouth?"

"I...I don't know." 

"Well I do. Come this way." They followed Richardson into a room where a few photographs had been spread out. "These are possible recipients for your mind's data. Now, we have had the technology to do this for a while but we only recently...learned how it works, how it operates. We need volunteers so we can gather as much information as possible. It helps us in our...endeavors. These are the potential bodies for you, Will, and for you, Tyler."

“Jeez, what the hell? These are all toddlers!” Tyler yelled, getting freaked out, his eyes darting for some escape. 

“I'm sorry, Tyler. We can't provide you an adult body and I don't think you would want to be a girl, right?”

"So give me a body my age!"

"The pre pubescent and pubescent stages have some difficulty transferring. You could be downloaded and not download properly. If that happens you would essentially die, and we can't risk that because the percentages are against it. If you download into a grown adult body or a boy 5 or younger you have a very high success rate."

“But this is so not fair! I'm 12 and half! This is crazy! I'm not gonna do this!”

“Shut up Tyler! I think this is just desserts for you recklessness.” Will barked at his son. "Maybe you'll learn something from being much younger all over again. And maybe this time you'll keep your grades up. You'll be the smartest kindergartner in your class!"

"I hate you so much!"

"Yeah well, I am your father. You don't have to like me. As long as you do what I say and keep your mouth shut. And I'm guessing no one would believe a 5 year old who claims to be the witness to murder involving alien UFO cover ups, am I right?"

"Right you are!" Richardson replied. "So sign these legal waivers and vows of silence and sworn testimonies...here, here, here. Tyler, I don't require your signature as your father can sign for you."

"I'd be more than happy to!" Will signed all of them with flourish. He looked eagerly at my son. Soon he wouldn't be half the problem he had been and he'd be ten times easier to discipline. He could just carry him up to his room and lock him up whenever the mood struck me! How he'd longed for the ability to do that lately!

"Now, Will, if you can just make the choice for yourself..."

"Him. How about him? He looks huge!"

"That would be model J9. Now we can't make too many copies of any of these so you'll be getting the only one. He was a soldier who volunteered his DNA in the mid 1980s."

"He's the size of a truck. Did he die?"

"Yes, recently. That's why we cloned a younger version of him. There will be no one recognizing you, or associating you with him even on the faint possibility that someone thinks you look familiar, due to the age difference."

“Well, I guess I could get used to being in that body. What is he, 6'2"?"

"6'4" and a whopping 240 lbs of pure muscle. The cloning vats tend to work ideally on the human frame if there's little fat ratio on the finished product. And your new bodies will be very hungry when you wake up."

“It's not fair! Dad is gonna be this tough looking guy and I'm gonna be a freaking toddler!” Tyler screamed and tried to run away in vain. A few military men caught him effortlessly and held him between them.

Soon they were escorted to a room in which there was what looked like some sort of machinery with lots of wires attached to a few conical domes. Before they realized what was happening they got a shot on the arm and everything went black.

I blinked a few times. There was a man in a green camo shirt in front of him. He looked familiar. It was the man he was supposed to become!

“What the hell?” Will stopped short. His voice was weak and high pitched. He felt oddly energetic but something was off. In fact, everything was off.

Everything around him looked too big and tall. He started to get scared. He ran to a nearby mirror and a little boy was staring back at him.

To his relief Richardson came into the room and started talking. “I'm sorry Will. There was a mix-up and the bodies are assigned in the wrong way.”

“Why don't you fix it already?” Will shrieked. He was disgusted by his new voice.

“Unfortunately we can't fix it." Richardson looked very guilty. "We can't try this again on the same person because it's too dangerous. You could both easily die if we transferred you for a second time. We've learned that the hard way. It's a (ahem) bug we haven't worked out yet."

“But what about me? I'm a fucking kid now! I can't live like this!” Will screamed frantically.

“Shut up SON. I think this is just desserts,” said Tyler with a smug grin on his new rugged, handsome face.

“What? I'm not your son!” Will yelled.

“Actually, you are legally his son now. Your name is Dylan Walker Jr. and he is your father, Dylan Walker Sr.” said Richardson.

“Well, did you hear that, son? Don't worry buddy. I'm very happy to be your dad and I'll try to be the best dad for you,” said Tyler, flexing his new arms in wonder.

“No, no, no! This can't be happening!” Will started crying heavily, unable to control his childish emotion.

It was explained to Will over the next few hours that he had signed every legal waiver. He and his new "father" would be transported someplace isolated. Dylan Sr. would have a nice new office job and get a few months training beforehand at the military base, where they would stay until it was ensured Tyler could pull off his new role. They would coach him and Will would be placed with other toddlers to get him used to being around children.

As for Tyler, waking up had been a dream come true. He had been awake a bit longer than his father and the sensation of waking up in an adult man's body for the first time flooded him with new hormones and feelings. He enjoyed the weight of his body, of walking around and feeling so incredibly powerful! After they took him to another room to talk to him, and told him to spend some time thinking about how to talk to his father and not abuse the situation, it dawned on him that he was now in charge of his father. He was really going to be the parent of the family and his dad had absolutely no choice about it. They did some tests on him in his new body and took him to the gym where he tested his strength. He could live hundreds of pounds now! It was the most amazing moment of his life!

As the military police left their new temporary apartment on the base, Tyler walked up behind his father, who ran into the next room, but Tyler was too quick for him. He scooped up his new son and held a hand over his mouth. 

"Boy, someone up there must really like me, huh dad? You weigh nothing at all!" He placed his former father down on the ground and said "Don't even think about going anywhere. I'm like five feet taller than you now."

"What are you going to do to me?"

"I'm going to be a good father. That's what. And I want you to fall in line. You will do everything I say or I will beat the living tar out of you. Okay...SON?"

THREE MONTHS LATER...

As the military escort drove away, brought the last of the heavy boxes inside and yelled for his son to come inside for lunch. 

"Junior, get in here! It's time for lunch!"

"Yes, daddy." Junior came running. He was wearing his stuffed animal backpack and his overalls. 

Dylan gave his son some sandwiches and cracked himself open a beer. He gave Junior some lemonade.

"To the new us!" He toasted. "Now your dad has got a lot to do, son. You're going to go to a new school tomorrow. Don't let any secrets slip out, alright? Like, don't mention how you used to be an adult or that I used to be a kid or there might be a belt that meets your ass. Okay, sweetie?"

Junior gulped. Dylan had been stern but fair so far but he had had military escorts around. Now they were alone for the first time, and Dylan was now used to being an adult.

"Yeah, I think I'll find you a babysitter soon so that I can go into town and have some fun every now and then. Check out the bars, meet some new guy friends. Adult friends. Maybe bring home a friend. I want to try this new dick out, ya know?" 

The former Will's cheeks burned with resentment and humiliation. 

"But that's okay with you, right? Oh wait, I don't care what you think. I'm the adult and you're not."

"Yes, daddy." He replied.

"I'm gonna go outside and have a cigarette. You can watch TV when we unpack all your things in your new room." 

Dylan went outside and lit up a Marlboro. He had taken up smoking while playing hoops with a lot of the guys on the base, most of whom knew nothing about why he was really there. All he was allowed to say was that he was a consultant. And of course they introduced him to the gym and taught him how to take care of his new adult body, and he relished lifting weights with all his heart. He loved it, and he loved having facial hair to shave. He relished everything about Witness Protection. They had finally found the last town they would move to! He was going to love going to a job and he loved that his father would be going back to school. He was smart enough to do this and besides which, the military had provided him with a guide in Richardson, who he could call anytime he needed help.

This was the best identity he'd ever had, he thought, as he finished his cigarette and went back inside to help his new son.

I hope I did a Good Job Tonight

"Let's see...I think I have this right." I said, carefully shaving my face. It was still new to me.

"You're doing great," said Lucie. She was dad's girlfriend. Well, technically now she was my girlfriend. But she wasn't.

I finished shaving and splashed water on my freshly shaven face. I could feel the stubble still. My face was so rough now! It felt weird still. I am not used to it.

"Okay, so now we just need to get you dressed and ready for the party. I'll go over it one more time with you. What is your view on the renovation project for the school?"

"I'm all for it. The sports program brings a lot of money into the school. We deserve to have a decent...um...environment. Working environment. And student environment." I looked at her hopefully.

"We deserve a good infrastructure."

"We deserve a good strucshure."

"Infra. Structure." She sounded the word out. "And what else? What's your view on the collegiate scholarships?"

"I think we need to increase them by...15 percent!"

"Yes. Good. Why?"

"Because it isn't asking too much, it's just the right number. It's uh...it's..."

"A diplomatic solution."

"Right. Yeah, that. A diplomatic solution. Do I have to wear a tie?"

"Yes, you do. This is important. I can't believe that's you in there, Chase."

"Me neither. It feels weird being tall and big and I have to tell all these football players what to do. I have a job..." I trailed off in disbelief. It had only been four days since dad and I had switched bodies but it felt like much longer, like months. I had thick stubble for days because I didn't know how to shave. And I didn't know how to drive so Lucie had to drive me everywhere.

"How's the cure coming along? Have you found the old man?"

When my dad was coaching college football, I often got left out. I'm only twelve. Well, I was only twelve. And then one day this old man was watching the players practice. We were the only ones there. He said he knew my dad, but later when I told dad about it he said he had no idea who the old guy was. Anyway, so the old guy was talking to me and I told him dad never spent any time with me. I wasn't angry. Just sad.

"No," I say to Lucie. "No trace of him. No one has seen him. Except me. That once."

"Well I put some internet postings up. And we'll work this out. I promise. We will find a way to get you back. But for now...just...try to act like your dad."

"Okay! Um..."

"What?"

"Can you help me with the tie?"

She smiles. "Sure thing, tiger."

Tiger? She only calls my dad that! She didn't seem to notice, though. I change in the bathroom and I'm standing there in my underwear and overhear her on the phone.

"No. No he hasn't found out." Lucie closed the door to go into another room in the house where she couldn't be heard. What? What did she mean?  "I have been. Yes, I did. Yes. Of course. Thanks, grandpa. I owe you one." I'm standing outside the door. I'm only wearing my dad's...er...my boxer shorts. She comes out startled.

"Hey! Pete, sweetheart. What are you doing? You should be getting dressed."

"Did you do this? Did you make it so me and dad switched bodies?"

Lucie looks panicked and then pulls me into the walk in closet. It's cramped but I can still stand up without having to bend over. She pulls on a light bulb string so we can see.

"Okay. So...yes. Yes, but! You can NOT tell your father. You two can go back to normal but I need to teach him a lesson first."

"Why?" I ask, totally bewildered.

"Because he made out with another woman. And he doesn't spend any time with you. He really doesn't even think of you most of the time. Well, that's changed."

"I guess that's true."

"I uh...I have to say though that so far you have been doing a wonderful job of being the man of the house." She ran a hand over my big crotch. The boxers aren't covering all of my dick now and it's getting bigger. I gulp.

"Oh...um.  Thanks. You're um. You're pretty. I mean, you're nice. And um." I stand there, awkwardly, and she continues to run her hand up my massive chest.

"I will tell you what. Keep this a secret until I switch you guys back at the end of the month and I will...make it worth your while."  She kisses my neck and starts rubbing my sides.

"We're gonna be late." I say meekly. She runs her hands over my arm hair.

"I guess we'll just have to be late then." She kisses me and takes off my boxers. I'm at full mast now. I've had some practice with my new dick over the past few days but it's like it has a mind of it's own now. I groan as she gets on her knees and puts her mouth over it. In no time I'm getting the hang of my first blow job! I just can hardly believe it!

"We have to be quiet. Dad's still here."

"He's in his..your room playing video games."  She goes back to licking my cock immediately. She's insatiable. Soon I gasp and clench everything and all of my cum is squirting into her throat and she is eating it! A girl is actually eating my cum! This is so cool!

She stands up and kisses me and I put my big arms around her. "Maybe we don't have to switch back," I whisper.

"I'll consider it. But you have to bring home the bacon. Do a good job at the big adult formal dinner tonight and I'll consider it. Tiger," She kisses me once more and goes off to brush her teeth. I'm naked except for a wife beater. She brings me a towel. I get to the bedroom and lie down on my dad's bed and cradle my new cock before putting on his...my shirt, my suit, my pants, my tie. Hey, I tied it all by myself. I grin to myself. Maybe being dad won't be so hard.

Tucker is a cool guy.

Tucker and I had always been best friends. We're in the 7th grade. Well, we were. I am. He isn't. That's him sitting next to me, driving me home.

"So how've you been, man?" He puffed on his cigar.

"Uh...good. Science class is okay."

"Mr. Henderson! I kind of miss him. Fuck, I couldn't go in there now. Even to say hi. Know what I'm sayin'?"

"Uh...yeah. So...how is your dad?"

"Dad? You mean junior?" He laughed somewhat cruelly. "Little man is falling in line. He's a bit jumpy ever since I whooped his ass for trying to make phone calls to his old friends. Of course none of them actually remember him bein' an adult."

It was true. Ever since Tucker and his dad Phillip woke up one day and had inexplicably switched ages, no one had noticed except me. Tucker had freaked out at first, showing up at my house and I thought he was some crazy guy (dressed in his dad's bathroom robe no less). He was pretty scared and cried and knew things that only Tucker could have known. I had to send him away because my parents came downstairs. Then he went home and got a call...from his boss. It turned out everyone else remembered Tucker as the adult and Phillip as the kid.

When I asked him if he knew what could have done this he said no. But the more he insisted he didn't know, I got the feeling he was lying. Like, we were in his room and he was checking out his reflection and loving it and I could swear he said "it worked" under his breath. "What worked?" I asked.  "Oh nothing," he said. "Just, you know, the mouthwash I've been using. My teeth are really clean now..." He smiled and felt his new muscles and arm hair.

Ever since the initial switch he's been hard to get a hold of. I kept asking if he needed any help with anything and he just told me to look after his miniature dad at school. Everyone remembered him as my friend but inside he was still a bitter adult, having to live childhood over again. It was weird and I felt powerless and stressed out and thought he must be the same but when he asked me if I needed a ride from school, I couldn't have been more surprised. He was driving like a pro, and smoking a cigar! He looked every part the adult in the family, and he was acting...well...confident.

"So here's the thing, man. Boy. Whatever. John. You're my friend and all but like, I'm a grown up. I can't be friends with an 11 year old."

"I'm 11 and a half!"

He laughed. "That doesn't matter. People talk. Hang out with my new son. We ain't changing back if you know what I mean heh heh heh." He rubbed his stubble and checked out his reflection in the car mirror. "I look so freakin cool now. OH and I nearly forgot. As a thank you for helping me out before, I got you a DVD." He pulled over in front of my house.

I looked at the gift in my hands. "Green Lantern? We made fun of this movie."

"Really? I don't remember. Sorry. I was trying to give you something kids would like."

"You are a kid!"

He smiled, in a "kids are so amusing" way. He flicked the ash of his cigar.

"Look, I'm sorry. But as far as everyone is concerned I am 31. I can't be friends with you like I used to. I have adult friends now. I even have a girlfriend. And she does things to me, dude. Holy fuck!" He laughed mischievously. "Oh yeah, she loved the gift I gave to HER last night, man. Ho-holy fuck, I'm a lucky man. Man. MAN. I. Am. A. Man. And lovin' it." He puffed his cigar and exhaled. He took off his sunglasses and held out his hand for me to shake. "This is goodbye, John. I'm sorry."

"Yeah. So sorry you won't even tell me what happened?" I refused to shake his hand.

"Don't know what you're talking about, little man. Now if you'll excuse me, I gotta get to the bar. I gotta meet my girl. You have a good day now, son."

I didn't look back. I just got out of the car and walked into my house and tried to forget everything about him. But it haunted me. Because we were friends. Maybe if I buddy up to Phillip we can figure something out. But I doubt it. Tucker seems pretty sure of himself. I don't see things as going back to "normal" anytime soon. It's a shame. Tucker is a cool guy. But I guess getting older really does change people!

My New Old Boss

My boss Mitch fired me last week. What he didn't know was that my family had a long tradition of exacting certain magic spells onto our enemies and friends alike. Most of the time I used my magic for good, trying to make a better world. I would make spells to mend friendships, make people more attractive if I felt they really deserved it. I would sometimes even help people after bad breakups to help them forget how bad they felt. In other words, everyone at work liked me without really knowing why. People feel good around me.

The exception was Mitch. Mitch was head of my department and had long given me a hard time, even promoting far less qualified people ahead of me. The office didn't like him all that much but I was his least favorite. Mainly because I'm gay. He used the economy as an excuse but I was one of the best employees there, and everyone knew it. If he had been more fair, I would have felt bad about what I did next.

I walked straight up to Mitch's spacious house on Friday morning. Mitch answered the door with a cigar in his mouth, customary for him.

"What the fuck do you want? You ain't gettin' your job back, faggot! Get out of here before I call the police!"

"Invite me in," I ordered, and opened up his mind to a very temporary hypnotic spell of suggestion. For the next ten minutes he would have to do as I asked.  "Now let's go into the kitchen. Act normal."

"Sure, why wouldn't I?"

"You will do everything I say. Get your son to come downstairs. And put your cigar down in the ashtray."

"Jeremy! Come downstairs!" Mitch barked. He put his cigar down. His cel phone went off. He answered it. "No, do as I tell you to do for once and get those reports in and I don't care if you spend all day doing it! And you won't get overtime. It's your fuck up. No, I don't care what everyone else is doing today. Your such a worthless piece of shit. Do I have to do everything? Get your ass in line! And don't call me again. I'll be in soon and then I can ream your ass out all over again. You stupid piece of shit. How about I fire you? How about that? You want that? No? Then stop blubbering." He hung up. "Fucking women."

Jeremy had come down. Jeremy was Mitch's ten year old son.

"Dad, who's he?"

"Huh? Oh, this is Nate. Nate, this is my son Jeremy."

"A pleasure." I shook his hand. He was shy and retreated back into the corner. "Although I think I remember you at the family picnic."

"Yeah, well get ready for school. Don't just stand there." Mitch ordered.

"No, Jeremy, don't. I have something to tell both of you. Mitch, stand up." Mitch stood up. I placed an amulet around his neck.  "Jeremy, put this on."

"Dad?"

"Tell him to do as I say. Please."

"You heard him, Jeremy. Do as Nate says. Wait, why am I doing everything you say?" Mitch looked confused. Time for the show to begin!

I began the incantation, which was in a language only sorcerers could speak, one which had been extinct for 4,000 years. In a matter of minutes, it was done. Both amulets glowed intensely in the morning light, then flickered outside of the gems, hovering in the air, and crossing over to each other's necklaces before disappearing inside the opposite gems.

The man and boy blinked.

"You can take off the necklaces now. Thank you." I collected them and put them in my briefcase.

"What the fuck are you doing in my house? Get the hell out of here!" Mitch started to scream. The spell was wearing off.

"Not so fast, shorty."

"Shorty? Who are you calling?  Wait...what happened? How'd you get so tall?"

"Dad??" Jeremy asked, wide eyed. His dad was getting shorter! Mitch shrunk a full foot and a half, until he was swimming in his shirt and tie and he panicked, screaming and looked at his shirt draping over him until it touched the floor.

"What the fuck??? What the fuck! What the fuck did you DO to me!" His voice came out like that of a much younger man.

"Now it's your turn," I told Jeremy with a devilish grin. Jeremy was now taller than me. He had been so concerned with his dad he hadn't noticed until he was at my eye level.

"No way! No way!"

"See boys, I am a lot more powerful than a mere office worker. I have other duties which I attend to. I have other bosses in another world and I do a lot more than just oh, make copies. Jeremy was standing next to me, and looking down at his shrimp of a dad, who had lost any sign of stubble and suddenly become very smooth faced.  Jeremy's face aged to that of an older teen and then a young man in his twenties.

"No. This isn't possible!" Mitch screamed, and it was the voice of a child. He still had a man's face but that wouldn't last long.

"Dad? Dad? What's happening, mister? I'm as tall as my dad and he's my size and holy shit!"

"Don't you use that language you little shit!" Mitch screamed. Mitch now looked like his teenage self, with the height of a child. Jeremy's face aged considerably to a man in his thirties, only wearing a Pokemon shirt that was stretched out way too tight.

"Ow!" Jeremy took off his shirt to reveal some very nicely grown muscles. "Is that my voice? I sound just like you dad!"

"And now you look like him. Go find a mirror, Mitch." I said to Jeremy. "And as for you, Jeremy. Let me help you out of those big boy clothes." I lifted off the dress shirt and tie off the bewildered man-child. His face was now that of his son's.

"I'm a grown up and I look like you, Dad! Did you do this? Why? Dad, I'm so tall. Wow, I can't believe this! this is so like, cool and stuff!"

Mitch had to clutch his boxer briefs, which no longer fit his childlike frame.

"Change us back! I'll...even hire you back! I promise!"

"Shut up. You're not doing anything. But you, son, you are. You are going to take over for being your father for the next few years."

"What? WHAT?" They both said in unison.

"Yes, until Jeremy is 17, I am making you the father Jeremy, and you the son, Mitch. So you'll go by each other's names. You are now Mitch," I told the grown man. "And you are now a little boy. Some put on some of his clothes. It's time for you to go to school. I'll drive, since I'm the only adult here who knows how. Oh, don't worry, I'll teach you later, Mitch." The bewildered shirtless man peeked under his own stretched out shorts, and took them off so that he was in his underwear.

"WOW!" He looked around in confusion, then headed to the bathroom. "WOW! My pee pee is SO BIG!"

"Don't do this. Don't do this. I can't be a child. He is the child!"

"I did my homework. You have some other family that you don't see that often. Your ex wife never visits since she moved to Europe. And you are very stern disciplinarian to your son. Well, I guess that wasn't a very good idea, in retrospect. You are more of a bully, to everyone. And now your son will be in charge of you as punishment."

"You better change me back or I'll kill you you son of a-"

I picked him up and lifted him in the air. He let out a terrified yelp.

"OR YOU'LL WHAT SHRIMP?: Don't like being so small? Well tough shit. I tossed him down on the ground and he whimpered. "And your son is my size...a bit bigger actually. Just imagine what he can do."

Jeremy was behind me now. And smiling widely. "Yeah, dad. I'm bigger than you now so you better do what I say. You're gonna go to school so get ready!" Jeremy then walked over to the still burning cigar and put it in his mouth.

"Don't you dare! That's mine!"

"Shut up, shrimp." I sneered.

"Yeah, shut up shrimp," he said, smoking for the first time. "Wow, this is COOL! This is SO COOL!" Smoke came out of his lips. "My mouth tastes funny, dad. No wonder you like doin' this smokin stuff."

"I think it's time for you to both get dressed now. We're wasting time."

Jeremy savored his cigar as I helped him into his new shirt and pants. I showed him how to tie a tie, but told him we would practice more later. The new little Jeremy sulked out in his son's clothing and sneakers.

"Your shoes feel funny, daddy."

"They're dress shoes," Jeremy said sullenly.

"Okay, Mitch." Both of them looked at me. "The new Mitch. Get used to your new names. Okay, new Mitch. You and me will drop off the youngster then go into the office and you'll rehire me and give me a new position and a raise. Is everyone ready?"

"You'll pay for this! I swear it! And if you so much as dare to tell me what to do I'll make you pay for it!" he said, threatening his new dad. The new Mitch got angry for the first time. He put down his cigar stub and walked over and adjusted his tie and felt his new muscles.

"Oh yeah? How you gonna make me? With these?" He yanked on his dad's pipe cleaner arms.

"OW! Stop it!"

"Stop being such a baby! That's what you tell me. You're gonna be short and I'm gonna be tall. So do as you're told." He crossed his arms and smirked down at his dad. "You're not gonna change us back, right mister? I don't want dad to ground me."

"Oh I'll change you back after seven years. In the meantime, get used to being Mitch and have fun with it."

"I can do that!"

"And later...I'll take you to a strip joint and you can really enjoy this body of yours."

"You with like naked girls and stuff?" Mitch's face showed shock and childlike awe. "Really?"

"Yeah, man. You're a grown up now. As for you junior, do you have your backpack?"

"I...yes."

I drove them to work and school and later Jeremy had a blast. He is doing a lot better in the month since I switched them. I have been teaching him the ropes of his job and he is a lot more pleasant to be around. Everyone says how glad they are that we are friends now.

And helping people is what friends are for. Thanks to me and my new old boss.