Tuesday, June 19, 2018

The Amazing Mr. Cachimbo: Father's Day Special Part 1

Mr. Cachimbo's Fine Tobacco. It appeared on the street corner of a popular neighborhood in the old part of town. It was the downtown historical district, and had old timey lettering on all the storefronts. Cachimbo's suddenly appeared and a number of men noticed that there was a special weeklong Father's Day Special. Mr. Cachimbo's is not a chain but it appears in many towns like this. Not too big to be considered cities, not too small to stand out. It travels. It appears where nothing was there before but a vacant store.

In reality it places itself into that space and I change it around each time. I am Mr. Cachimbo and I'm an immortal. How I became immortal? Long story? My powers though, are limited to tobacco. I can enchant it and anyone that I sell it to. It's my specialty in the magic world, you could say.

This Father's Day I set out to do something a little different. Most of the time I enchant men to make them cigar and pipe smokers, and to enjoy the company of other men. But on Father's Day I liked to do something a little different and change their lives around for a bit. I decided to do father and son body swaps, or age swaps. This year it was body swaps. Many of our customers have found new happiness changing the "roles" in their lives or reversing roles with someone they are close to. In honor of Father's Day, here are some stories of fathers and sons that learned to do things in a slightly new way...thanks to yours truly.

DARRIN'S DAY



Darrin didn't want to go home. He had just bought himself a Father's Day cigar. His son was six and the divorce had been brutal. He downed his beer. That guy Cachimbo sure had been insistent he take this particular brand. But it was worth it. The taste was incredible. Funny how he had never smoked a cigar before in his life but now he was completely enjoying the experience, in a way he had never anticipated. He didn't want to leave until he finished it, and he was almost compelled to smoke it all the way to the stub. The bar didn't have a problem with it and though he had never smoked before, he felt right at home doing so.

The phone rang. That was the ex wife. She was dropping the kid off finally. In an hour. He finished his cigar and drove home. He really wanted to spend as little time as possible with her but it was necessary in order to spend time with the kid. Poor Rich.

Rich, when he finally came, looked sad as his bitch of an ex wife dropped him off.

"Hey, kiddo." He hugged his little first grader.

"You smell bad!" Rich huffed and puffed and ran upstairs to the room he kept when he lived with his dad.

"Hey, that's a premium stench. You'll understand when you're older and manlier."

"No I won't!"

Darrin followed his son. "Hey, don't go running off like that, talking to me that way. Turn around."

"No," Rich said, folding his arms. "I hate you today."

"Why do you hate me?"

"Because the kids made fun of me because my daddy doesn't live with me anymore."

"I'm sorry, kiddo. That was really mean of them and they shouldn't say things like that. If I had it my way, I'd be living with you all the time."

"You're lying!"

"I'm not lying. I wish there was a way for us to spend more time together. Hell, I wish you lived with me. But you don't." Suddenly he grew very woozy and everything blurred. He realized he was on the floor and another man was on the floor, too. He stood up and looked around. Then up. At himself, as himself got up.

"Hey," the man who looked like him said. "What happened?"

I soon discovered that I was a six year old boy again and my son was inhabiting my body.

"NO WAY! I'm taller than you! Hahaha! This is neat! Yayyyyy!" My son took off in my body and ran down the stairs.

"No! Wait! Stop!"

My son in my body hopped around the living room, knocking over a lamp, which cracked as he fell, tripping on the power cord.

"Ow! Owwwww," He started crying immaturely.

"Stop crying! Men don't cry!"

"I'm not a man, I'm six years old!" he said in my voice. "Why am I tall, what's happening!" I got him to pull himself up and stand in front of me. We looked into the mirror in the living room. My cel phone rang from HIS pants. I pulled it out. It was a voice I didn't recognize. It told me the cigar I'd purchased had a magic curse on it and I was able to stay with my son if I was able to remain a six year old, while he took my place as an adult...and I explained it all in detail to my son.

"So, we can stay together, pumpkin. You can be the adult. You now have custody of ME, somehow. I guess things are different only so long as I remain a child. I can't believe I'm even considering this."

"Can we go back, Daddy?"

"We can. The decision is up to me. He said if I let you be me, you'll get all my adult knowledge and I'll lose mine. I'll be like a kid again and you'll be a grown up."

"Dad? I like being big! This is the coolest thing ever! It's like, so cool and I'm tall now! Vrooooom!" He said, starting to make airplane noises as he pretended to fly around the room.

"Hold on, son. I'm not sure I want to go back to being six again, even if it means you and I can be...together again."

"I knew you were lying! You're just a big liar!" He sat down and pouted on the couch, acting very immature for being in such a big boy body.

"It's just...I have been an adult such a long time and..."

"You don't really care about me!" he pouted. I tried to console him but he kept acting sad and angry with me. Things went like this for two whole days. In that time, he learned how to drive and acted really happy when he talked about touching things he couldn't reach before. Every day was a new discovery...I had caved on calling Cachimbo to ask him to reverse this.


A few weeks later, the new Darrin pulled into the parking lot where Cachimbo's used to be. Dad...er...his son, that is, had been complaining about having to go back to school and relearn everything and now hated being a shrimp boat again. I lit up a cigarette. God, I loved being an adult. Riding my hog. Going out whenever I wanted to, provided the little guy could take care of himself. But then Dad...I mean...my son...started to act more and more lost without me I knew I couldn't just leave to go to bars and shit. I even curse like a grown up now. Crazy! I was playing with toy motorcycles just a month ago and now I could ride one! I even cut my hair and bought this leather jacket as my new look.

I go to dad's job and I do accounting work. But I love dressing up in leather and riding my chopper. Fuck, I wonder if uh the new Rich will need help with his homework tonight...I better go. After all, Cachimbo's has completely disappeared so he's gonna need me for a little while longer...


SAM'S DAY



This is freaking awesome! I'm only 11 and I'm smoking cigars! I can pretty much do that because I'm dad now. I mean I am a MAN now! It's so wild.

Dad was smoking one of his cigars on Father's Day and I had forgotten to make him a card or buy him one. He said something about how I needed to respect him and we got into an argument. Anyway, I told him he had it so easy and he wished I could know what it was like to have to live in his shoes...and now I am!

Dad has been going crazy. Apparently the guy who sold him the cigar is some crazy wizard. He told Dad that it was up to ME as to whether we went back or not. So I smiled and said, sure Dad. Maybe in a few years. You know, when my body is older and you're tall and big and then I can go to college. I'm even making sure he calls me Sam, which used to be his name. I know it's confusing but it's better if we make a full commitment to being each other.

Dad is furious but I got all his knowledge.



I also got a boyfriend. It's weird how mixed up everything is. I was gay in Dad's body for some reason. He won't admit to me it's because he's always been gay. Mom probably knew when she was around (she skipped town and we haven't heard from her since I was five). I love being a grown up so much! I can have sex, smoke cigars, drink, drive. I mean, I go to work, too. I'm a bartender and I talk all day with interesting hot guys. What more could I ask for? I mean, I could call Cachimbo. But I heard that place just up and moved somewhere. I am gonna break it to Dad eventually...I still have the dude's number but I'm not going to call it. I'll tell Dad I lost it. Well, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna spend some time with the BF. Check you later.

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