Subjects: Dave and Brad
My name is Dave and I'm straight. My friend from work, Brad, is gay. He's the shorter one. I'm the one with the big grin on my face because I just spotted one of the most gorgeous women flirting with me earlier waving hello from across the room. And you know what that means? That means Dave is getting laid, that's what that means!
What could be better than a party with a cigar, a hot woman flirting with me, and a great job that pays me a lot of money? Well as I was about to find out, that's about as good as it gets.
"It's just so easy for you," Brad muttered.
"What is? Oh come on, man, you can have just as much fun as me, you just don't want to."
"I can't believe you're saying that. There is no way I can do what you do. The room is swimming with conservative Republicans. I'm the only one who is openly gay at this company. You think I have someone to flirt with? I hate these things."
"Come on, dude, stop complaining, you people can't have everything your way."
"I mean it's like you want gay this gay that, you can't have it everywhere, bro, just be happy for us straight guys."
"Yeah, thanks. You know, you are making this so much easier, Dave."
"Making what easier, man? You in love with me?" I puffed my cigar.
"You wish," he said darkly. "You know, I was wanting to give you a chance and you just blew it. Enjoy the rest of the party." He checked his watch. "We should be leaving in about 30 seconds, so enjoy your ability to be the majority while it lasts. BUDDY."
"What the hell do you mean by that?" I watched him smile and leave. Weird. I kept mingling and then 30 seconds later there was this flash and I felt dizzy. I got my balance and some guy caught my arm.
"Sorry, bro. I almost fell over."
"It's okay, handsome." he replied. It was Adam from accounting. "Oh. Thanks."
"Anytime, tiger," he said, putting a hand on my side and winked, and kept mingling. Okaaaay. Brad must have put him up to that as a joke. Then I noticed a couple of old ladies from the marketing department rubbing each other's noses and slipping each other a kiss. I looked around me. Several men who I'd known as straight and married for years were involved in what I could only describe as a gay liplock! Like, they were tonguing each other in fucking public! What the FUCK!
"What do you think?" Brad said behind me.
"I think I must have hit my head. Is this a practical joke or something?"
"Nope. It's Gayworld 39. I believe that in this universe there was a plague that killed off all the straight people in the 1700's and only gays survived, worldwide, we had some kind of immunity and ever since almost every child born has been gay, some kind of mutation to the virus at birth. There are still straight people, maybe about 2% of the population. They might even get straight marriage legalized soon. Neat, huh?"
"I'm going to enjoy this party. Don't wait up for me, sugar." He grabbed my ass firmly and left me there, staggering around.
I found out quickly the new pecking order was very conservative and I was at the bottom. Everyone thought it was kind of cute that I tried to flirt with Jessica, who had winked at me and blew me kisses just minutes before. She laughed it off as me being drunk and then slipped into the arms of Melissa, who was one of the vice presidents as well as her sugar mamma. I felt like I was going to have some kind of anxiety attack. I left the party and went for a drive back into town. Every fucking place I went I saw gay guys holding hands, or lesbians. I got home and my house looked the same. Except for some of the magazines. The Advocate for straights lay on the kitchen table. I thumbed through it. This must be a prank, a really elaborate prank. Every article was about brave straight people trying to be themselves in a gay world. I clicked the TV on and saw a few old shows were different somehow. Joey and Ross were the it couple on Friends. Joey was unaware that guys at the museum were always throwing themselves at him, being a bunch of nerdy scientists, and were telling him how good he was at paleontology just to get in his pants. Ross explained but Joey's feeling's were hurt. Ross made it up to him with a romantic gesture and the two kissed at the end as they snuggled on the infamous Friends couch.
"This isn't happening," I muttered, flipping further. But yeah, there was president Obama with his husband Jay-Z, giving a speech about empowering straight people even though they didn't share the same culture as the rest of us. It flipped back to an irate Rick Santorum talking about how disgusting the straight agenda had become and how he and his husband and four children along with the two mothers that birthed them, would not stand for it. Children belonged with two dads and two moms and sex for procreation was just that, for pregnancy only.
I blinked. I watched for a few more hours, numbly. The big shows had an all gay storyline. Seinfeld had jokes about how Jerry had a different boyfriend every week. Big Bang Theory the nerds were all dating each other. I came across an old Hercules movie from the 60s where he comes across a harem of young men who all throw themselves at old Steve Reeves.
I looked through some of my now porn collection. Straight Gangbang, Straight as an Arrow, Straightened Out...unimaginative titles from studios like HisHer Productions. The doorbell rang and it was Brad.
"Well, well, how are you enjoying yourself. Enjoying your straight pride, buddy?"
"What did you do?" I accused. "This isn't funny, faggot!"
"Excuse me? You're the fucking FAGGOT in this universe, straight boy!"
"Change it back, change it back right now. Please. Please, I...I can't live like this. This isn't normal."
"Awwwww, well now I guess you know what it's like and now that you've had a taste of your own medicine I guess we'll just go back to normal."
"No. What, do you think I'm stupid? I'm being promoted to vice-president, SHITHEAD. And if you want to keep your job, you better start kissing my ass. But uh, I'll leave you to watch some TV, god knows I'll be enjoying movies a lot more from now on. Hey, did you know that in this universe, there hasn't been a single Disney character who is openly straight? But hey, don't worry. One day."
"You fuck." I watched helplessly as he left. When I returned to the office on Monday I was thoroughly inundated with gay life. Everyone was gay at work. I was the only one who dared to admit I liked women. It was announced that Brad was being promoted. It came as cause for celebration from nearly everyone, and I heard several guys admit they'd try to get into his pants to curry favor with him if he was willing. The next day he called me into HIS new office. He was sharply dressed and smoking a cigar and he looked at me, beaming.
"I saw so many guys humping on billboards and ads everywhere this morning. This universe is fucking great! Hey, buddy, have a seat." I did so, not wanting to feel anything. "Now uh, Dave, I think what you need is a good talking to. I have a solution for you."
"You'll put me back in the right universe?" I asked hopefully.
"Oh no. No no. No. You're stuck here for life, buddy." He took a drag off his cigar. "No, but what would you say if I told you that I had a way to make you normal? You know, gay. Like me and everyone else."
"Excuse me? I am normal!"
He smiled. "No you're not. No, you're lonely. Try being straight in this world for a while. Oh sure, you might be able to hook up with a nice girl but if you get her pregnant she's going to find a nice wife to take care of her most likely. Or she'll give it away to a nice male couple. No, buddy, I can make all your problems go away. You already feel it, don't you? How many women even noticed you this last few days. My heart sank. No woman ever looked at me. I felt like I'd been yanked out of everything I knew. "I can make you normal, but I want you to ask me. Ask me to make you gay."
I thought about it. "I...I just want to be who I've always been."
"You're a jerk, is what you are. I can make you better."
"So you won't put things back?" I asked, crestfallen.
"NEVER. I want you, and I've always wanted you. And you were an insensitive prick and now that the shoe's on the other foot, I'm willing to make you gay so that I can finally be with you."
"Even if I was gay, I wouldn't be with someone like you. You've fucked with existence, with reality itself."
"And I want you to suck my dick."
"But...that's so unfair!"
"Well if you ever want to move up in this company, you're going to have to make a few sacrifices. And don't even try to mention sexual harassment. Straights don't count and it's a big gay boys club up in this universe."
I thought about it. I didn't want to do any of it, but then I thought how hard it would be, how difficult my life would be, how much prejudice as a straight man I would endure.
"Fine. Let's get this over with." I blinked. Something had gone through me.
"Feel any different, stud?"
As soon as I looked him I knew I wouldn't have a problem sucking his dick.
"Now what was that about going back?"
"Just shut the fuck up and kiss me." I gave him a cum tinged kiss and he tasted his own cum in my mouth. Me, Dave, the old ladies man. Brad and I never got together but I noticed people stopped looking at me so differently and the guys at the office finally warmed up to me when they heard I was willing to come over to their weekend orgy parties. It's not a bad life, just different, and sex is definitely easy to come by, and that's the important thing!
Subjects: Chester and Dakota
"Ewwww, get off me queer!"
"Haha, you know you like it, bro!"
My life is a living hell. My name is Chester and that's me on the bottom. I'm straight and my brother's best friend is Dakota, and he's on top, annoying the shit out of me. Ever since he brought me into this dimension he feels like he can just treat me like a piece of meat both at home and in public. I've been told by my parents I should just let him fuck me to get the sexual tension out. My parents are now just my dad and his HUSBAND. My mom is nowhere in the picture anymore. I've been in this fucking gay universe for like three weeks and my life is now a living hell. I can't tell anyone I'm straight because here straight is totally weird and considered against God and shit. Fuck. I really don't want my big brother snooping around, either. He's only a year older than me and he gets BOYS to come home with him now rather than girls. It's so gross, I have to hear them fucking and my dad is actually proud of him! They went shopping for sex toys together the other day! My dad even gave him some leather gear! Like it was normal!
Dakota did this, and I freaking hate him for it. You want to know what my average day is like now? Check this shit out:
These are all my friends and they all used to have girlfriends. This shit goes on ALL the time and everyone thinks it's normal, good fun. These are the new all-American boys. No one thinks of straight when they think manly. You have to be gay to get into the military here. Straight guys are the subject of jokes. I flipped on the TV the other day and Louis CK was just going on about how effeminate straight guys are and how funny they were in general to want pussy. At school it's a fucking nightmare. Guys catcall me all the time and bigger guys consider me to "look like a bottom" and even my fucking gym coach grabbed my ass the other day and gave me a wink!
One night my father and his husband (who used to be our neighbor and now he freaking lives with us, too weird for words) went out and said we were on our own for the night. Chester was telling everyone that we were really good friends now and he was very interested in spending some quality time with me.
"Chester? Do you want to get comfortable? Why don't you take your shirt off. Come here, buddy. Take your shirt off for me."
"No...I want to go back to the way it was."
"Shhh...shhh, I fixed everything earlier. Don't you feel different, sweetie?" He put his hands on me and I knew he'd made me gay finally. I gave in and took my shirt off and he rubbed my head.
"Come here, sweetheart. Doesn't it feel good to be gay? To be in my arms like this?"
"I...I guess so, but it's still weird." I let him caress me. We watched TV for a few hours and then he kissed me and I just kissed him back for a while until my dads walked in on us.
"Uh oh! What are we interrupting here!"
"I told you! I told you our son wasn't straight!"
"Stop that! Chester, don't listen, we never thought you were straight, would you stop?" Dad kissed his husband and they went off to bed.
"You wanna go to prom with me, sweetheart? We can even get matching tuxes."
I cuddled with him. "I guess that wouldn't be too bad...
SIX MONTHS LATER
Well, now I'm only a junior in high school but Dakota has proposed to me. I truly love him. I know what he did to me is wrong but he told me he will always protect me. And it turns out I really am a HUGE bottom! I loved having him inside me so much I couldn't imagine ever going back to girls, that would just be so...wrong. When he gave me the ring my dads were nervous but proud of us. They said it showed a lot of maturity but they wanted us to wait until after college before actually getting married. We both thought that was a fair thing to ask and at school no one could believe how lucky I was! It's not every day you get to be the Homecoming Kings. But we were and it's been a wonderful life so far being gay. I can't believe I was ever so nervous about it. I know that Dakota changed me in more than one way. I know he made it so I would fall in love with him. I don't know how he did it, but I don't care anymore. Even though it didn't happen naturally he is going to be my husband. I am in love and I have a man who is always going to be there and take care of me, and that means way more to me than living my life in a stupid boring straight world. The way I see it, Dakota saved me. Now if you'll excuse me, we have a secluded camping weekend to get to...us and maybe ten other boys are going to have an orgy up in the woods and it's my first one. My dad says not to be nervous but I'm going to be sucking a lot of dicks! I hope they all like me as a cocksucker as much as a friend!
Oh, and I forgot one other thing. These are my dads now. The one on the right is my new dad and the one on the left was my dad before. They are pretty hot togther, don't you think? Well shit, I know it sounds slutty, especially after I got engaged but I have to say that both my dads do get me hot. Maybe one day they'll allow us to all be adults together and I can suck their dicks as well. I really can't get enough of my boyfriend's cum and I can't believe I used to be so obsessed with boobs! Eating cum is the fucking best and my hormones are going crazy...sometimes I get boners over my dads and my boyfriend at the same time in the same room!
Well, enough about me. Dakota said before he slipped the ring on my finger that if I wanted, he would reverse everything, make it so I wasn't in love with him, eating his dick every night, get my mom back, but I said fuck that! I'm gay and so is everyone else and that is just the way I like it now!