My name is Mr. April. I have a habit of showing up on a very particular day...April 1st. You see, for starters, I'm an immortal. Number two, I can change my appearance. And number three, I can change other people. Most people have forgotten my story. The ancients celebrated me and even worshiped me. I have a much lower profile of course. In the olden days, I used to make minotaurs left and right. But I am bound by the same rules genies are. I can't really allow myself to be exposed this modern world. There are reasons for this. Immortals used to be in charge and now mankind has new gods: technology and science. We are allowed to reveal ourselves....well...at a much later time again but that's a different story.
Here you see me in 1974. That was one of my better years. I was a camp counselor. The kid you see next to me was named Gary. Gary was a good kid but so down on himself. He always had problems relating to other kids.
And this? This is Sam:
Sam was another camp counselor I worked with. AND I HATED HIM. Let me explain. When I first met him, he introduced himself and proceeded to tell me he was going to go out with this girl he had just picked up. You weren't allowed to bring guest to the camp but no one followed that rule. Guys shacked up all the time. In addition to banging his newest conquest, he was a terrible counselor. He liked to separate the "losers" out so the bigger, stronger kids could pick on them. He called it "survival of the fittest".
Well, after a month of this, I brought my own girl to camp. She was very pretty and worked at the local movie theater. Sam got her alone and the next thing I knew the two of them were running off to a cabin on the other end of the woods so they could get alone and naked.
He had it all, looks, rich parents, and a motorcycle. I know what you're thinking. Why didn't I just change myself to be more handsome? Because I've been there and done that. I like to attract people based on my personality. But they both failed my little test. The next morning, I switched Sam and Gary's bodies. The screams from Gary's cabin was the best. The panic of his prepubescent voice. I chuckled to myself when he came out and even taunted him by his original name. I explained he better play by the rules or I would leave him like this by summer's end.
Gary in Sam's body woke up next to a beautiful woman and before he panicked too much I sneaked into his cabin and whispered to him what I did.
It took literally no time at all before this shy kid became a FUCK STUD. It is so awesome watching that process. Watching him freak out at first, a prepubescent mind so shy, so vulnerable, to looking at himself in the mirror and loving what he's seeing, loving his new stubble and ability to smoke cigarettes. I told him he better wake up his new conquest. That morning the two of them at least made out, his first time kissing a girl. He was on cloud 9 all day as I explained to him his job wasn't that hard. Together we encouraged the kids to form new groups every week and did activities that made sure that everyone had the chance to win at some point. It was more equal and he made a better counselor. He learned to ride a motorcycle. I taught him that, as he gleefully accepted my lessons. He eventually (as in like in three days) got around to fucking that girl of his. He was nervous at first but soon got the gist of it. I prepared him plenty so he wasn't going to be an uneducated virgin. Her screams that night told the tale. Yes, I listened in. He was so hot in that body! Being bisexual and immortal has its perks.
The biggest perk came at the end of summer when I called them over alone to discuss my plans for them did not include switching them back.
"Awesome!" the new Sam shouted.
"NOOOO!!" the new Gary whined.
The kid pleaded with me but as I looked at the MAN who was now a stud I explained that my power is only available to me to use on OTHER people on April 1st. With myself, it's any time. It used to be more frequent in ancient times but things changed. Rules of the gods. It's complicated.
The last I saw of SAM he was on his motorcycle with a cigarette dangling from his mouth with a chick wrapped around his arms and the last I saw of GARY he was miserably looking at his new parents indifferently rushing him towards their car, bound for a school where he was unpopular and smaller than most other boys.
Happy April Fool's Day!